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Dear Liz,
Thank you for this comment. It IS amazing how we hide parts of ourselves in order to fit in and then, as you say, end up not “fitting ourselves.”
It also seems to be a theme, in this group. I have been reading some of the other Prima Materia posts and have seen this same issue, expressed in different ways, reveal itself again and again.
It leads me to wonder: What happened to us? Not us, as individuals (every one of us likely has a thousand personal stories of rejection and abandonment), but US as a generation of truth seekers and tender healers. What happened, to this world, that has caused so many of us to feel unsafe in expressing our unabridged selves? And how did it happen? And why? And who is benefitting from our collective silence? And who, or what, desperately needs us to open our mouths and speak?
“I will not abandon myself” means that I will not erase parts of myself anymore, out of fear of not surviving the backlash. In fact, those unerased parts (in particuar: my heart) are the ones that will catch me as I fall—and then I’ll realize, “hey… I didn’t fall after all.”
Here’s to all of our courage!