-
Dear Cara,
Hi again. I literally just replied to your Prima Materia post, then opened the book I’m currently reading and these words jumped out at me, almost as if they were asking to be shared with you. Here they are:
“Learning how to be loved, even by yourself, can be exhausting and sometimes even feel fake. You may succumb to the urge to hide, or eat junk, or do things you know are bad for you. But this is always a call for love.
It is in these fallow times, when our efforts feel forced and there’s no momentum with our progress, that we must aspire to love ourselves more generously. It is up to you to name your orphan’s secret beauty and lure it out of hiding.
Shame, when it is welcomed, allows dignity to emerge; betrayal’s hidden medicine is true loyalty; isolation hides a longing for intimacy, and so on. If we take the foundational idea that there’s a redemptive quality behind the darker, edgy, difficult emotions and experiences, then we are well on our way to making our house into a home.”
From the book Belonging by Toko-Pa Turner (page 126).
(When Toko-Pa writes about “the orphan,” she is writing about the version of ourselves that is estranged from our Wholeness.)