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MemberMay 25, 2022 at 1:03 pm
Benjamin, I just appreciate you and your response so wholeheartedly 💖 First, I hope to attend “Soul Church” on Sunday – I will be camping but it’s not particularly remote so as long as I have service and a charge on my phone I will zoom in.
I’m so glad you took the time you needed last week, and that your cup is filling. I see how deeply and consistently you show up in care of others – and I get it. I love being able to show up in that way for others, as I’m sure you do as well. But I’m still learning the dance of not leaving myself completely in the spirit of service.
I’ve languaged this post above in a real and raw way, and the feelings are true. But in reality I also know that this time around I left myself a little less than I did the last time. I’m a little gentler and more nurturing to myself. When I say I turned away from my supports I mean I skipped a few days here and there. I responded more quickly by reserving Saturday this past weekend to have zero commitments and to do exactly as I pleased all day long. And it made a difference. And my dreams showed up for me today in a way I could truly see/hear/feel/know the truth of the moment for me, for which I am extremely grateful. As you say – this work takes time. I don’t imagine it’s my last time working this part of the circle. But I know a little more now and hope to keep these insights close to my heart the next time I lose my way.